From the keyboard of Dr Jan

This evening I had dinner with my friend Michael, who I haven’t seen for ages. We used to work together 2 jobs and about 5 years ago.

Michael is an Evil Landlord, although 5 years ago we did computer systems for airlines. In fact, he’s a Fabulous Chap and a Stout Fellow to boot. He also has a helicopter license

A couple that Michael knows were getting married in Denham, and wanted to arrive at Heathrow airport in style, so they asked him if he could fly them there.

After some investigation, it transpires that landing a helicopter at LHR will cost you about £250, so not entirely unreasonable. It’s £100 to land, £10 for navigation (whatever that is) and the rest is for handling.

It seems that everyone at the wedding party thought the Bride and Groom were joking when they said they were taking a helicopter to the airport.

Until Michael landed outside the venue

Michael said it was one of the most exciting trips he’s ever made. Although the Bride and Groom were even more excited, so he appeared to be the cool and calm professional by comparison

When they arrived at Heathrow, he was aiming for the helicopter landing area when he noticed a bright yellow pick-up truck with lights flashing zooming towards them at a large velocity. The truck did some kind of handbrake turn, and suddenly the huge ‘Follow Me’ sign was visible. So, they dutifully followed the truck which led them to a man waving big lollipops in the air.

Of course, no one on the aircraft knew what the flapping lollipops actually meant, but they landed nearby and all was sweetness and light. Perhaps the lolly man is the ‘navigation’.

A limousine picked up the happy couple and whisked them away to destinations unknown, which is all covered by the ‘handling’ fee.

So, a fabulous trip all round. It’s Pop Heli Tastic, mate!